“You are likely to see no general reformation till you procure family reformation. Some little obscure religion there may be in here and there one; but while it sticks in single persons, and is not promoted by these societies, it doth not prosper, nor promise much for future increase.” — Richard Baxter
When I think about reformation in the home, I think about Eugene Peterson. Peterson's 'claim to fame' was writing the Message Bible. For many pastors (myself included), Peterson was our pastor. In my life, a few men have taught me how to shepherd and love people well: JC Ryle, Bill Eubanks, Bryan Hurlbutt... and Eugene Peterson.
Most had not heard of Peterson until the Message. He wasn't a big personality. For almost 30 years, he pastored the church he planted, Christ Our King, which averaged 200 or so in attendance. He was not a celebrity preacher—truth be told, most thought him dull, which is why you never found him on the conference and teaching circuit.
A theological giant, Peterson could run with the best of them. His love for God, the Bible, and people, in many ways, will go unmatched (Peterson died a few years back at his home in Lakeside, Montana).
One of the lessons I learned from Peterson is that being a good dad to my children is an essential ministry [second only to loving, serving, and protecting my wife]. I have many titles, but "Of all the titles I've been privileged to have, 'Dad' has always been the best."
One of the greatest privileges of my life is being dad to Scarlett, Malachi, Calvin, and Oliver. As their dad, I am deeply committed to being a blessing in my children's lives, not a burden. How do I best bless my kids? By doing three things that only I, their dad, can do:
Consistently pray for them.
Spend time with them.
Remind them of God's unwavering love.
At Peterson's funeral, his son, Leif, testified to his (Peterson's) faithfulness. Leif said, "29 years of pastoral ministry and my dad had everyone fooled—29 years, and he only had one sermon—for all those books he only had one message…" "It was a secret," Leif said, "that my dad had let me in on early in life."
The secret was a message Leif had heard repeatedly throughout his life—a message his dad whispered in his heart for 50 years. Night after night, Peterson would sneak into Leif's room and say:
"God loves you.
God is on your side.
He is coming after you.
He is relentless."
Men, be a blessing to those close to you. Pray for and with them. Spend time with them, even garbage time [excellent piece by my friend Adam Tarnow]. And tell your family that you love them—tell them God loves them.
And for you men reading this who have never heard words similar to the ones above, I've got a secret to tell you: God loves you. God is on your side. He is coming after you. He's relentless.
Love ya'll.
- Harp
My two oldest boys have started collecting cards. I'm hyped. It's like I am reliving the 5th grade all over again. Sometimes, on our way to Bible study, I will surprise them with a few packs. The goal is to open them at church, most weeks, we open them in the truck, the anticipation is too much, LOL.
A close friend of mine was hyping Malachi up about his collection. He asked, "What do you love most about collecting cards?" My son answered, "Getting to open packs with my dad..."
It's the little things that mean the most. You don't have to be a Disney dad to be impactful. Pray for your kids. Tell them you love them. Tell them God loves them. And every now and then, pick up a few baseball cards on your way home from work.