To Hell With Resolutions

Behavior-Driven Christianity

"People do not drift toward holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness." — Dallas Willard

Last week, I woke up one morning and read the book of Malachi. Chapter 2 cut me... God tells Israel that He has "grown weary of their words" [v17].

Israel was all talk. And God was tired of it.

In some ways, that describes my 2025. I refuse to let it be my 2026.

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Guilt-Shame-Death Loop

I’ve never been much for New Year’s resolutions. I think the devil loves them… Most are built on a familiar ethic: "try harder… do more… this year will be different."

The 'try harder,' 'do more' story rarely produces transformation. Typically, it produces early momentum, quiet fatigue, eventual failure, and then the added burden of shame for not becoming who we hoped we’d be. What starts as conviction becomes empty talk, leading to the guilt-shame-death loop. That is not how people are formed. It’s how they are worn down.

Recently, I came across the Vision – Intention – Means [VIM] framework thanks to Mason King. Developed by Dallas Willard, 'VIM' was his answer to a thin, behavior-driven Christianity that mistakes effort for formation and activity for obedience. At its core, VIM asks a fundamental question: How do people actually change?

Willard’s answer is both freeing and demanding. Real change does not begin with trying harder, but with seeing differently. It requires a compelling vision of life with God, a settled intention to pursue that life, and concrete means [practices, rhythms, and relationships] that slowly retrain the soul.

Willard always believed that spiritual formation is not an event [I agree]. And neither is it a resolution. Formation is the long, patient work of grace shaping a willing life. I need more of that in 2026... Maybe you do too?

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Vision: What do I see?

Vision is a compelling picture of life as God intends it. Vision is not just information; it’s imagination baptized by truth. Vision answers:

• What kind of man am I becoming?

• Why is this better than the alternative?

• What is at stake if I don’t change?

Without vision, change feels optional, and obedience feels burdensome. That’s because a man seldom fights for a future he cannot see.

Intention: What have I decided?

Intention is a settled commitment of the will. Intention is the line in the sand. Not "I hope," not "I’ll try," but "I have decided." Willard famously said: "Desire without intention is useless." Intention answers: Have I truly decided to change? Or am I waiting to feel ready? Is this a preference or a conviction?

Without intention, vision stays theoretical and growth stalls at inspiration. Men default to posturing, and posturing is cheap.

Means: How will I train?

Means are concrete practices that reshape the soul—the disciplines, habits, and structures that make change possible. Willard was clear: "Grace is not opposed to effort; it is opposed to earning." Means include [but are not limited to]:

• Spiritual disciplines

• Community and accountability

• Confession and repentance rhythms

Most men fail not because they don’t love God, or they lack information, but because their vision is vague, their intention is unspoken, and their means are absent. Willard’s insight is devastatingly simple: You never get transformation by accident.

I think that’s what I most appreciate about the VIM framework: it dismantles passive Christianity [God will change me someday], behaviorism [just stop sinning], and emotionalism [if I feel inspired, I’ll obey]. Rather than just trying, you get clarity and training—you get actual change.

Vision inspires change. Intention commits to change. Means make change possible. That’s how souls are formed.

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Harp’s VIM for 2026

I'm not just a preacher, I’m a practitioner… The four areas where I am seeking intentional growth in 2026:

1. Fatherhood Presence

Vision: "I see myself as a patient, present father whose children associate me with peace, joy, and direction."

Intention: "I decide that my kids will not get my leftovers."

Means:

• Fixed daily time with my children

• Phone-free meals

• Monthly one-on-one rhythms with each child

• Consistent discipline structure

• Daily prayer with my children, not just for them

2. Scripture Engagement

Vision: "I see myself as a man shaped by God’s Word—steady, discerning, rooted."

Intention: "I decide Scripture will be a non-negotiable, not a spiritual accessory."

Means:

• Scripture before screens every morning with a fixed daily reading plan

• Read aloud [slows the mind]

• Weekly memorization, not just consumption [memorize the entire book of Philippians in 2026]

• Group study for accountability

3. Anger & Emotional Regulation

Vision: "I see myself as a man who is slow to anger, firm but gentle, strong without being volatile."

Intention: "I choose to confront my anger rather than justify it."

Means:

• Silence when triggered. Think before responding.

• Naming emotions before reacting

• Scripture reframing [James 1:19–20]

• Physical practices [slows the heart: breathing, walking]

4. Vibrant Prayer Life

Vision: "I see a life where prayer is my reflex, not my last resort."

Intention: "I decide prayer will shape my days."

Means:

• Written prayers [slows the soul]

• Daily praying Scripture

• Weekly prayer walks

• Corporate weekly prayer with the team

Sporadic prayer is not a time problem; it is an intention problem

I encourage you to use VIM this year. Pick 3 or 4 areas where you want growth [share your VIM with someone(s) you trust]. Give vision to each one. Name your intention. Get practical with your means. And when change isn’t happening, ask:

• Is my vision compelling enough?

• Have I actually decided?

• What are my concrete means?

Remember, one missing piece breaks the chain. And you’ll be no better off than the 98% of people who leave the gym by February 15.

Here’s to REAL change in 2026.

For the King,

— Harp

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The start of a new year is a great time to [re]engage with God’s Word. Two resources you might find helpful:

The Word Diet by D. Eric Schansberg. I love what Eric and Kurt put out. Years of pastoral experience, packed into real-world practical methods.

Courageously Following God’s Word by BetterMan. Say less.