One Good Thing This Week
Today… 'was a good day.'
My wife is an absolute killer. Stay at home mom of four. Homeschooler. Chef. And she quilts like a seasoned grandma. Incredible.
To help keep her sanity, every few months or so, we put something on the calendar—a time away for her and me. It is a calming bright spot in her otherwise chaotic world, something to look forward to when the day-to-day grind gets overwhelming. This week, we went to Nashville for a couple of days [our favorite city].
Nothing too exotic. Nothing bougie—a 72-hour retreat, just her and I. A time for her to relax, download, and catch up with her pirate of a husband. We do 2 or 3 of these a year. It keeps her sane and allows me to remind her how much I love her [three things I tell my wife daily: You’re beautiful. I love you. And I am still in love with you].
Putting these dates on the calendar has been a life-giving practice in our home. Because of our kids' ages and stages, date nights are sporadic. Conversations can run dry, and intimacy moments are missed. But there is always something on the calendar to look forward to…
"Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us." — Samuel Smiles
One Concerning Thing This Week
The caving and acquiescing around transgender athletes that both the NCAA and Olympic committees are allowing is mind-blowing. This week, a man dominated the IVY League swimming championships, setting up an NCAA Championships where he will square off against Olympian and American sweetheart Katie Ledecky. It will be interesting to watch how the nation [and NCAA] responds. Suzy Weiss over at the Free Press wrote an incredible piece on this [a must-read]…
“When Thomas won the 500 free, I started chatting with a security guard. What did he think when she won? 'Speechless,' he said. 'Just speechless.' What did he think the solution was? Will the league change course? 'Nothing will change. This is Harvard. There’s no controversy. No racists,' he said. Then, with a wink, 'Everyone is equal.’"
As a father to a 12-year-old girl and 11/5/4-year-old sons, this concerns me deeply. My oldest son [11], who boxes, was recently asked to spar against an 11-year-old girl. He declined the match, telling me, "Dad, we don’t hit girls. We protect them." I am less concerned for him and more concerned for my daughter. There is only so much I can protect her from. And right now, the biggest threat seems to be a world that is telling her to get ahead, she must be more like a man. Or, at the very least, beat one.
Lord, help us.
"…male and female He created them." — Gen. 1:27
My 3 Favorite Quotes of the Week
"Gratitude looks to the Past and love to the Present; fear, avarice, lust, and ambition look ahead." — C.S. Lewis
"A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for." – William Shedd
"Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart." — Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Stat(s) I Found Fascinating [And Alarming] This Week
"Four in five Christians with a history of porn use (82%) say they have no one in their life helping them avoid pornography—and that number is even higher for non-Christians (88%). Now is the time for the Church to step up and fill this gap."
Pastors, leaders, and brothers, we must step into the gap. A great resource to deploy:
My Favorite Meme This Week
Song I had on Repeat This Week
My guy said… 'The forerunner who bore lumber for short comers…' Unreal—one of the coldest lyrics ever.
"I don't follow y'all way, I follow YAHWEH."
Book(s) I Read This Week
No book review this week; instead, I am endorsing a movie! Average Joe.
I typically see four types of men today:
1) The Uninitiated. They don't speak for themselves, and they don't speak up for others. Head down, diaper bag in tow, they are usually six steps behind their girl, failing to lead in every way.
2) The Self-Initiated. They live for self-exaltation and will do whatever is necessary to achieve it. The constant pursuit of adoration and praise typically comes from a deep, dark place of pain.
3) The Peer-Initiated. The 55-year-old frat guy who has tasted some semblance of brotherhood but never grew up [emotionally]... sophomore year of college was a banger.
4) The Culture-Initiated. Like a feather in the wind, whichever way the cultural winds blow, he goes along to get along. Gullible and naive, because he stands for nothing, he falls for everything.
What we need are Spirit-empowered men. Men like Caleb, men of a different spirit (Numbers 14:24).
Coach Joe Kennedy is a spirit-empowered man. Grab your fam, people from church, and most importantly, those young men you are trying to point to Jesus, and go see this movie. You'll be glad you did.
Get tickets & watch the trailer HERE.
Video I Watched This Week
Phillip Anthony Mitchell… bro is anointed.
What God Showed Me This Week
"I have written something to the church, but Diotrephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge our authority." — 3 John 9 [ESV]
"…but Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us…" — NKJ
"…but Diotrephes, who loves being in charge…" — Message Bible
Brothers, I am really wrestling with ambition this week. I believe it was Bonhoeffer who said, "Ambition and initiative are two roads that lead to hell," because they are road paved with self…
Yet, my whole life, I have been taught and trained to be ambitious. And I have been. Like Diotrephes, I love being first among men.
Diotrephes only appears in 3 John, but what is written about him places him among the 'infamous’ characters of Scripture.
John begins his letter to Gaius by rejoicing over Gaius’ faithfulness to the truth (3 John 3-4). Gaius’s response in faith and love is contrasted with a very different response from that of Diotrephes. Diotrephes refused to "receive us," John said, because he loved "to have the preeminence among men."
The Greek word John uses for 'preeminence' is philoprōteuō, which means "to love or desire to be first or chief" or "ambitious of distinction" (Strong).
Gaius was devoted to the truth and cared for others, Diotrephes cared for himself and was dedicated to advancing and maintaining his standing in the church. Lately, I’ve felt more like D than G.
I'm not sure what the Lord is doing, but I would appreciate your prayers. Also, if you have any thoughts or readings on Holy Ambition, please send them my way.
Many have asked if I will be anywhere 'live' in the coming weeks! The answer is YES! I travel and speak 2-3 times every month. This week:
Tomorrow, October 6, I’ll preach at Harpeth Christian Church in Franklin, Tennessee.
October 9-10, I’ll be at the Kingdom Leadership Summit in Washington, DC.
If you are in the area(s), I’d love to meet you and chop it up! Let me know—charper@betterman.com
I hope you have a spectacular week. May the road rise to meet you, may the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields. And until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of his hand.
Love y’all,
—Harp
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Me: "Alexa, play Carl Douglas."
Alexa: "Playing songs by Carl Douglas." (Cue "Kung Fu Fighting" starts playing)